JACK AND JILL
by Nikira
Summary: This is personally my fav fic, I just thinks it's funny. I was inspired by Pulp Fiction, though with less cursing. I'd like to hear (well read actually) what you think of it.


Jack and Jill Jack and Jill   


Alexandra Arkham walked carefully through the old abandoned building. She pulled a cobweb from out of her way. 

_Whatever the hell this is_, she thought angrily, It better be good to drag me to this part of town to a building no one's been in for years. 

She finally got to a door, which was incongruously placed, the high-tech steel metallic door stood out from the old dilapidated building. As soon as she walked up to the door, she heard a beeping noise. 

"Identification", the door said. 

Alexandra rolled her eyes. 

"Alexandra Arkham", she said in a loud sarcastic tone. 

After a few seconds the door rolled back and Alexandra stepped inside. The room was not that different than that   
of the rest of the building but it was set up with tables and large bulky objects that were concealed. She was immediately greeted by Reese Hayworth, an employee of Intertek. 

"Reese?", she said as he came up to her. 

"Alex-, uh-I mean Ms. Arkham", he said, "Welcome, we're glad you could make it." 

Alexandra looked over his shoulder to see who "we" were. There was Reese's partner, Julia Gavin, some other people from their staff and Damian Smith, the new CEO of Arkham Industries. He was the next logical choice of CEO after the untimely demise of Johnathan Wilkes. 

"Well", Reese said leading Alexandra to her seat, "Now that the gang's all here, we can get started." 

He went up to the front of the room and was joined by Julia and the other two staff members. 

"What is this about?", Alexandra asked. 

"All questions will be answered once I explain", Reese said. 

Damian Smith put up his hands motioning him to proceed. Alexandra just shrugged. 

"All right", Reese said, "Well when we were given the grant by Arkham Industries to follow our technological research and come up with prototypes to help usher Intertek and Arkham Industries into the a new technological age", he looked at his speech on his index cards, "We weren't really sure how to apply technology to create something ground-breaking. That is until we were approached by Mr. Smith." 

Alexandra looked over at Damian Smith suspiciously. He didn't even notice her. 

"Well Mr. Smith-and Ms. Arkham this is what we came up with", he along with his staff unveiled the objects simultaneously, "We hope this is what you had in mind." 

Under the coverings were four mannequins, two men, two women; wearing costumes. The costumes were all black with a different color. The suits reminded her of something she'd seen before but she couldn't quite place her finger on it. Alexandra's eyes glanced around to see if she was the only one who had no idea what was going on. 

"Well?", Reese asked Alexandra and Smith eagerly. 

"What-", Alexandra started. 

"What does each one do?", Smith interrupted getting up. 

"Oh of course", Reese said following Smith as he inspected each one closely, "Julia can explain that. Gav?" 

"Right", Julia said walking over to the mannequins, "Well, the four suits come in different colors to differentiate between them. The blue is the most basic, its the only non specialty suit. The red, for heat and fire resistance; the gray for high pressure areas such as underwater; and all black for", she said uneasily, "For more covert operations." 

By now Alexandra knew what was going on and she couldn't believe it. 

"This is a joke right?", she said finally speaking. 

"I'm not sure I understand", Reese said. 

"What happened to the neurophysiological transmitting device?", she asked getting up. 

"Well Mr. Smith told us to get started on this right away", Reese explained confused, "I thought-" 

"Listen Alexandra", Smith said cutting Reese off, "This project was much more important than some mind control device." 

"It's not mind control, Damian", Alexandra said testily. 

"It might as well be", he said taking her aside, "This project is a way for Arkham Industries to make a name for itself in the technological field. I'm sure your little brain manipulation project can wait." 

"Brain manipulation?!", she asked angrily, "I didn't even authorize this. I was the one who gave them the grant-", she stopped and walked over to the mannequins, "What the hell is this?!", she asked in disbelief, "I can't believe what you're doing. This is some sort of Batman-esque policing suit!" 

"These 'suits', Alexandra", an irksome Smith explained, "Will revolutionize policing the streets of Gotham as we know it. With it Gothamites will no longer have the need for the Batman and his cohorts. Each specially equipped for different pertaining circumstances, any one of these privately owned prototypes could take the job of all of Gotham's vigilantes." 

Alexandra laughed in disbelief and looked at Reese and his staff. 

"So this is what you gave up the biggest medical technological breakthrough for", she castigated, "An anti-Batman suit?! This is laughable." 

"The money and prestige these prototypes will bring", Smith said, "Will be a lot more than you can imagine." 

"I sure of that Damian", Alexandra said sarcastically, "But aren't we all forgetting one major, minor detail here." 

"Enlighten us", Smith said dryly. 

"You're basing this whole project on something fictional. The fact is-"   


"Batman doesn't exist", Alexandra kicked the punching bag, "And after I said that they all looked at me like I was smoking marijuana or something. I couldn't believe it they really believe that the Batman exists." 

"So what did you do?", Jasmine Fox asked her giving the punching bag a swift jab, 

"I them the whole idea was preposterous and left", she said waiting for instructions on the next set. 

"You don't believe in Batman?", Jasmine asked tightening her glove. 

"You do?", Alexandra asked steadying her bag. 

"Okay", the brawny kickboxing instructor said, "Get ready for the next stance." 

"Yeah, sure", Jasmine said spreading her legs apart. 

"You're kidding?!", Alexandra said giving the bag a swift set of kicks and punches, "Please tell me you're kidding?!" 

"I'm not kidding, why shouldn't I believe in Batman?" 

"Because there is no such thing as Batman!" 

"Is that so?" 

"Yes that's so", Alexandra said punching the bag, "He's an urban legend, a myth fabricated by crack heads and crackpots in between their bouts of insanity." 

"If you say so." 

"No don't give me those statements of indifferent defeat", Alexandra said stopping what she was doing, "Tell me what you really think? I would like to know." 

"Fine", she said also stopping, "I do believe in Batman. Yes, I know the idea of some mythical man flying around the city fighting injustice is a little farfetched." 

"A little?" 

"But", she continued, "I believe in him because he saved my father's life. And if my father says that there is a Batman, I believe him." 

"Lucius was under a lot of stress, he has a very high profile job", Alexandra argued, "I'm not saying he's lying because Lucius is the most honest man I know." 

"That is true", Jasmine agreed. 

"But, he could have just imagined the Cyber being taken down by the Batman because he's heard of him and he-" 

"You saw him too Lexi", Jasmine pointed out. 

"When?", Lexi asked resuming her punches and kicks. 

"Remember the last time you were here, we were stuck at that sleazy bar because your car broke down." 

"It didn't break down", Alexandra protested, "It overheated." 

"Whatever, we were waiting for a tow truck and we almost got run over by car", Jasmine said, "Do you remember that?" 

"Vaguely." 

"Anyway, so that car was driving really recklessly and then all of a sudden, this long sleek black car cuts it." 

"Go on." 

"That car was the Batmobile. The car started doing all this amazing stuff and most importantly we saw it there, you saw it there." 

"That wasn't the Batmobile, because there is no Batmobile." 

"Then what was it?" 

"It was just some stupid stunt car and it was a stupid publicity stunt." 

"Really?" 

"Yeah, didn't you see the banner ad on the side of the car?" 

"What banner ad?" 

"You didn't see it? It was for some company, they must have sponsored the little show they put on." 

"Show?" 

"Yes", Alexandra insisted giving the bag a roundhouse kick, "Okay screw the car and forget the fact that your father says he saw him. The fact is, that the idea of a man flying around the city, like you said, single-handedly fighting crime, is much like some old fat guy flying around the world single-handedly giving every single child a gift. It's impossible." 

"He's not alone, he has partners...sidekicks, you know. Robin, Batgirl-" 

"Dasher, Dancer, Comet, Cupid, Blitzen", Alexandra said mockingly. 

Jasmine gave her a sharp look and kicked her bag, which swung and hit Alexandra in the face. 

"Ow, that was uncalled for", she said holding her bag, "You know, come to think of it, with the Christmas season approaching, I bet we won't see Batman around." 

"Why's that?" 

"Well think about it, unrealistic mode of transportation, impossible tasks, signature clothing, elves, sidekicks and reindeers, oh my", she feigned a gasp, "Maybe Santa Claus is Batman." 

"Well I'm sure we know who'll be getting a lump of coal this Christmas", Jasmine kidded, "What's that? Twenty years in a row now?" 

"Face it my friend", Alexandra said kicking her bag, "To adapt Shakespeare", she said in a British accent, "The Batman is a tale told by an idiot, full of sound and fury signifying nothing." 

"Well thank you Lady Mac Beth", she said taking off her gloves, "But you still haven't changed my mind." 

"Why are you taking off your gloves?" 

"Look around", Jasmine said walking towards the locker room, "Class finished ten minutes ago." 

Alexandra looked around the empty room with punching bags slightly swinging from the ceiling. She ran after Jasmine to catch up while taking her gloves off.   


"I'm in the mood for ice cream", Jasmine said walking out of the Gotham Sports Club, "Let's grab lunch." 

"I can't", Alexandra said heading for her car, "I have to the office before I go to..." 

Alexandra's voice trailed off suspiciously and that piqued Jasmine's interest. 

"Go where?", she asked raising her eyebrow. 

"Nowhere, I just have to go and run some errands", she said quickly, "Then I have to go to the office and get into some beef with Smith." 

"How's the new CEO working out?" 

"Not well", she said fetching her keys, "Financially everything's fine, but personally-", she looked over at Jasmine, "Where do you want me to drop you off?" 

"Why so eager to get rid of me, friend?", Jasmine asked suspiciously. 

"I'm not eager, I was just asking a question", Alexandra protested defensively getting into the car. 

"Okay, so where are you going?" 

"I told you, I had to run-" 

"Yes, and as much as I enjoy lies, Id like to hear the truth." 

Alexandra sighed as she started the car. 

"Promise you won't say anything." 

"Why, where are you going?" 

"If I tell, you can't say anything. Promise." 

"Okay, I promise on my life", she said quickly, "Where are you going?"   


"Arkham Asylum", Eileen Winters, Alexandra's secretary said, "Don't forget you have a board-" 

"Board meeting in one hour", Alexandra finished for her staring out the window wall of her office, "I know Eileen." 

"Just reminding you", Eileen said, "You have a knack for being late." 

Just then, Damian Smith came into Alexandra's office. 

"What's that smell?", Alexandra said sniffing the air. 

She wheeled around in her chair. 

"Oh Damian", she said, "I could sense you were coming." 

"Very funny", he said dryly and then turned to Eileen, "Ms.-" 

"Winters", Eileen finished for him. 

"Yes, please excuse us", Damian said as he ushered her out. 

"Excuse me", Alexandra said getting up, "But Eileen and I have not finished our conversation yet." 

"I'm sure Ms. Winters has more important things to do like collate files and type documents", Damian said   
sarcastically. 

Eileen gave him a deadly glare. 

"I do have to go", she said pulling her glare away from Damian and facing Alexandra, "If you need me." 

"I know", Alexandra said leaning on her desk, "Thanks Eileen." 

When Eileen left, Damian held out some documents. 

"If you're not going to treat my assistant with respect then don't come into my office", Alexandra said swiping the   
documents away from him, "What's this?" 

"The contract to start mass production on the...suits", he said handing her a pen, "I need you to sign it." 

"I'm sorry", she said, "Perhaps you missed my earlier performance at that abandoned hovel you dragged me to", she handed him back the paper, "I don't support this and I'm not going to sign it." 

"Fine, if you don't sign it I'll just take it to the board meeting", he said rolling up the paper in his hand, "And trust me, you will get voted down. Why don't you save yourself the humiliation and just sign it now." 

He placed the paper on her desk. 

"Why don't you think about it for a while", he said, "By the way, nice view", he said motioning towards the window. 

Before he walked out, he turned around and said: 

"By the way, give your father my best at the Asylum board meeting." 

"Are we already growing senile Damian", Alexandra smiled, "Why would he be there?"   


"I'm still on the board of directors for Arkham Asylum", Peter Arkham explained to his daughter, "Surprised to see me Alexandra." 

"Hardly", she said taking her seat across the table from him, "I figured you would find some way to slither back   
into some part of the company." 

"Did I mention that I'm still chairman of the board?", Peter asked smugly taking a seat at the head of the table. 

"Chairman of the Board, Peter Arkham", Alexandra said, "Alexandra Arkham. You, me. Hmm, I wonder if there are any more Arkhams here, you think so Pete." 

"I can honestly say", Peter said leaning towards her, "That there is only one Arkham here in this room, in this building. Me." 

Alexandra's eyes glowered but their tense situation was cut off by Bruce Wayne. 

"Oh I hope I'm not late", Bruce Wayne said taking his seat next to Alexandra, "Have we started yet." 

"No Bruce, just in time," Peter said, "Now that we are all here, we can get started." 

"First order of business, the rapidly rising budget deficit", Peter said, "I have some propositions on how to cut spending." 

_This should be good_, Alexandra thought to herself. 

"First of all, the main problem of spending is the ridiculously luxurious treatment the inmates-" 

"Patients", Alexandra corrected sharply, "They're patients." 

"This isn't a hospital, it's an asylum for the criminally insane. Criminals, gentlemen", he said looking at the other   
board members, "Located in this building are some of the country's most dangerous criminals. And Arkham   
Asylum has a reputation for being a revolving door for these sociopaths, letting them escape as easily as if we opened the doors ourselves." 

"And whose fault is that?", Alexandra accused, "You've been running the place for years." 

"So what do you suggest, Peter?", Bruce Wayne asked trying to quell the situation before Peter could respond to Alexandra. 

"I suggest more strict treatment", Peter said slamming his fist down on the table, "Any patient who has a history of escaping, will be put in maximum security." 

"This already is a maximum security institution", Alexandra interjected. 

"Maximum security within maximum security. Their rooms will be closely watched, they will be stripped of all their privileges, they will not be allowed to leave their cells, in where they will be restrained and only released for such things as feeding and personal needs." 

"You're going to chain them down?!", Alexandra asked incredulously. 

"Restraints." 

"I thought we just hired a hundred new guards", Bruce Wayne said. 

"Guards aren't enough", Peter said, "Criminal masterminds like the Joker and Harvey Two-Face are more than enough for all the guards in this building. If you want to stop the criminals from escaping, you don't look at the guards, you look at the criminal. This is why I recommend electrified cages, strict time regiments, less free time and a more sparse diet." 

"That seems a little extreme", Bruce said warily. 

"Extreme is right!", Alexandra put in angrily, "My God, where'd you get those ideas from Mein Kemph?!" 

"The idea may be a little extreme", Julian Abbot, another board member put in, "But after what Gotham has been through, I think it's merited." 

"Merited?! These are human beings we're talking about", Alexandra argued fiercely. 

"They are criminals, murderers, rapists, monsters!", Peter shot back. 

"No, you're the monster!", Alexandra said getting up out of her chair, "Yeah these people may be criminals but you are taking this way too far! Why don't we give them tattooed identifications, make them shave their heads and then put them into forced labor. Better yet, we'll just gas them, to hell with them!" 

"Let's just talk about this calmly and ration-", Bruce Wayne said softly trying to pull Alexandra down. 

"Shut up, Bruce!", she said pulling her arm away from his, "Why use ration, this is a great. If we go with this idea, they'll be no one left in Auschwitz Asylum! And when the human rights organizations come down on your ass, I'll be sure to testify against you at your hearing." 

"Are you done?", Peter Arkham asked calmly, his hands together. 

"Most definitely. Go ahead with your little plan because I know who you're really trying to punish and you won't get away with it."   
With that, she walked out of the room. 

"Is there anyone else whose morals and integrity might hinder any progress?", Peter Arkham asked looking around the room. 

"Me", Bruce Wayne said getting up, "I guess my pesky morals and integrity just won't allow me to take part in this." 

Bruce walked out of the room and expected to see Alexandra either fuming in the hallway or heading towards her car, neither of which she was doing. Alexandra had already seized this opportunity to bolt down the hallway into the restricted area where the "patients" were kept. 

"You can't go in there, lady", the security guard at the desk next to the door said. 

"Oh", Alexandra lifted up her clearance badge for him to see.   
The security guard eyed the badge curiously, Alexandra didn't blame him. Although the badge gave her the right to be in Arkham it didn't allow her to go into the restricted area to see the patients. 

"Alright, go ahead", the security guard said pressing a button that opened the door. 

"Thank you", Alexandra said passing through the door which shut quickly behind her.   
Just as Alexandra thought she was clear, there was another guard waiting by another door. 

"Is it just me or has security gotten tighter around here", Alexandra said with a wry smile. 

"Don't ask me, I just started here this week", the security guard said.   
New security guard, Alexandra thought to herself happily, They might as well have left the door wide open. 

"Last time I was here there was only one guard to get through and one door", Alexandra coming up to the desk, 

"But I guess with everything that went on..." 

"Yeah", the guard said, "State your name, business and who you're here to see. Oh and I need identification."   
Alexandra knew her old medical license and identification would come in handy. 

"Of course", she said taking out the id, "I'm Doctor Alexandra Arkham, I'm here for consultation on the research of the neurophysiological structure on one of the specific patients. I don't believe I'm on the list though." 

"No you're not", the guard said scrolling through the computer list. 

"Yes well I'm not supposed to be, if you understand what I'm saying", she said leaning in closer to the guard, "This research, although authorized by my father Peter Arkham, isn't exactly what you would call legally controversial." 

"I see", the guard said skeptically. 

"Listen, I'm quite busy and I could always come back at another time but frankly I don't want to", Alexandra said gathering her id and putting it back in her purse, "So here's what I'm going to do. I'm going to go either this way", she said pointing towards the exit, "Or that way", she pointed to the door of the restricted area, "Where am I going?" 

The guard thought about what do for about a minute and then slowly turned to the computer. 

"Which patient are you visiting?", he asked.   
  


"Harley Quinn!", the guard said, "Visitor!" 

"You shouldn't call her that", Alexandra said putting on her glasses. 

"Excuse me?", the guard asked puzzled. 

"You shouldn't call her by her alias, Harley Quinn. You really shouldn't do that for any of them, by doing so you're not making the situation any better", she put on her glasses, "See, these people, in laymen's terms, are delusionary psychotics. By calling them by their aliases you in fact keep up with the delusion of this persona they created, therefore making them believe that their alter egos actually belong in society. This greatly inhibits any chance of a full mental, if any recovery." 

"Oh, um sorry", the guard said still puzzled. 

"You can leave us", Alexandra said. 

"I'll be on the other side of the door, if you need me", the guard said leaving. 

"I'm no delusionary psychotics", Harley Quinn protested as soon as the guard was gone. 

"Please don't use that voice Adrian", Alexandra said taking off her glasses, "It's very irritating." 

"It's Harley now", Harleen said in her normal voice, "What are you doing here?" 

Alexandra shrugged, "I had to come...for a meeting, I mean." 

"Oh." 

"You know grandfather's dead, right?", Alexandra asked breaking the silence. 

"Yeah I know, I managed to get some extra TV time by crying over it", Harleen said sitting down on her bed, "I heard you got all the money too. God, Peter must have blown a gasket." 

"And then some", Alexandra said smiling. 

"So, little sister, what brings you to my neck of the woods?" 

"Didn't you already ask me that?" 

"Not in that phrase." 

"I know you want me to say that I came to see you and tell you that I missed you", Alexandra said playing with her watch, "But that's not the reason that I'm here. Peter's on a rampage and he's taking it out on you through the asylum. I just thought you should be warned in case you wake up tomorrow in chains." 

"What does he have against me now?", Harleen said bitterly, "Did I breathe too loud again?" 

"I believe it has something to do with dragging our family name through the mud." 

"Oh please, I'm not even an Arkham anymore!" 

"Yeah, rub it in the faces of those of us who still are." 

"It's not like you couldn't leave", Harleen said defensively, "You had a choice." 

"Leave the family and become an underpaid over stressed failure of a psychiatrist who was taken in and brainwashed by one of her patients to become his criminal henchgirl...or stay an Arkham", Alexandra said, "Some choices Harl." 

"I'll have you know that Mr. J didn't brainwash me and I very happy in my career choice", Harley said returning to her whiny, high-pitched voice, "If you ask me your jealous." 

"Yeah, it's always been my dream to be a madman's bitch", Alexandra said sarcastically. 

"Really", Harley spat back, "I thought it was a mobster's." 

"Oh, touché, Harley", Alexandra sneered, "You know-" 

Stopping herself from what she was about to say, she looked towards the door. 

"I'm not even going to bother fighting with you, we're practically in the same boat", Alexandra explained calmly, 

"Both our lives are nightmares and the only difference between us is that I don't have to take group showers." 

Harley picked up a book and jokingly threw it against the window wall. Just then, sirens in the asylum started flashing and the whole hall was illuminated with flailing red lights. Harley and Alexandra looked at each other in surprise both assuming Harley had set it off. Soon numerous guards were running frantically around the cells. The guard that she met at the second desk came up to her. 

"Excuse me, Dr. Arkham", the guard said grabbing her arm, "There's been a slight-" 

"I apologize for that", Alexandra said quickly, cutting him off; "You see I was-" 

"It's not safe to be in here, a patient's escaped", the guard explained. 

"What?!", Alexandra exclaimed, "Who?!" 

"Thomas Jackefsky", the guard start leading her towards the door, "It's safer if you leave the asylum." 

"Who's Thomas Jac-", Alexandra's eyes widened, "Jack the Ripper?! The serial rapist?!" 

"Uh-oh", Harley said childishly with an impish grin on her face. 

As the guard was leading Alexandra towards the exit door, Harley start laughing. 

"Buh-bye doc, come back and shrink my head anytime", she said waving with her little finger. 

As Alexandra mouthed Harley a "Go to hell" as she was being escorted out of the restricted area. She was hurried through the restricted area to outside the building, where police squad cars had already gathered. As the police stepped out of the cars, Alexandra saw an all too familiar but definitely not friendly face. 

"Circle the whole building, I don't want any door, window or hole unwatched or unmanned", an obviously irate Detective Harvey Bullock said. 

"Well, well well", Alexandra said walking up beside him, "If it isn't my old pal Officer Bullock, I see we're giving orders today and not breaking them." 

Bullock turned to look at her and his expression immediately went from bad to worse. 

"Oh great, this day just gets better and better, what are you doing here Arkham?", Bullock asked walking away from her. 

"Did you miss the sign when you coming into the building Officer?", Alexandra said following him, "Why would it seem out of place that I would be here?" 

"Because you shouldn't be!", the detective yelled turning around, "And it's Detective now." 

"Detective? No wonder corruption in the police department has increased dramatically" Alexandra said in a mock   
pensive mood.. 

"That's it! I've got an escaped sociopath on my hands, who also happens to be a rapist and an ulcer about the size of your head. If you don't get out of my face right now I'm going to make like old times and haul you downtown for obstruction of police procedures", he grabbed her arm and shoved her away, "Now take a hike!" 

"You take a hike", Alexandra muttered pulling her arm away, "And do some sit-ups while you're at it." 

Alexandra stepped back to survey the chaotic scene and decided she wasn't going to find out anything there and was better off at home. She walked over to her car and got inside. Driving out of the Asylum was much more easier than going due to the fact that all the guards were otherwise preoccupied. As she was driving away from the asylum, she realized what bad timing this escape was, just after Peter introduced his radical plan on how to keep the patients in the asylum. Then she remembered that something didn't sit right with her about the escape, or at least what the guard told her. 

_How would Jackefsky been able to get out without using force and how did he do it alone, that was highly unlikely for anyone in the Asylum_, she thought to herself. 

All of a sudden, Alexandra thought of something and started to turn her car around. 

"I wouldn't do that if I were you", a low voice said huskily into her ear. 

Alexandra's body stiffened and before she could move she felt the cold metal barrel of a gun on her neck. 

"Let me guess", Alexandra said, turning her car back around away from the asylum.   
  


"Thomas Jackefsky, otherwise known as Jack the Ripper, has escaped from Arkham Asylum earlier today", the voice from the television in Wayne Manor said, "Jackefsky, who admitted to raping and murdering twenty-three young girls over the span of eleven years, escaped early this morning. Police believe that he will be trying to flee the city but warn Gothamites to be cautious. If you see him, do not, I repeat do not, approach him, just call the police and give his whereabouts. He is believed to be armed and extremely dangerous, so citizens, especially women, should stay indoors at night until he is apprehended." 

Alfred Pennyworth, Bruce's chauffeur, switched off the television. 

"Is it safe to assume you won't be going to the office, sir?", Alfred said. 

"Jackefsky's a madman, it won't take long before he strikes, assuming he hasn't already", Bruce said moving the hand on the grandfather clock against the wall. 

"I'll cancel your appointments for the day", Alfred said following Bruce into the secret lair.   
  


"No", Jackefsky insisted pressing the gun into her flesh. 

"Listen...Mr. Jackefsky", Alexandra said flinching from the gun, "I have to cancel my appointments for the day.   
We've been driving around for two hours now, people are going to start wondering where I am." 

"So?" 

"So, they'll be looking for me", she explained turning onto a street, "Then they'll bring the cops into it and sooner or later they'll find me, which means they'll find you." 

Jackefsky looked down for a second to think. 

Let's hope this works, Alexandra thought to herself. 

"Do you have a phone?", Jackefsky asked. 

"Right over there", Alexandra said nodding towards the glove compartment. 

Jackefsky took the phone from the charger. 

"Just press 3", Alexandra said. 

Jackefsky pressed 3 and held the phone to his ear, then when Alexandra heard Ellen's voice come on the phone, Jackefsky put the phone to her ear. 

"Hello Eileen, it's Alexandra. Listen I won't be coming in for the rest of the day, so cancel any appointments for today." 

"You didn't have any appointments for today", Eileen said. 

"Oh, well thanks Eileen", she paused and looked at Jackefsky, "No I don't sound strange. I'm fine, really." 

"What?", Eileen asked confused. 

"Really I'm fine, don't worry about me. I'll be all right", Alexandra stressed. 

Jackefsky gave her a suspicious look and took the phone away from her and hung it up. 

"That's enough", he said throwing the phone aside. 

After a few moments of silence, Alexandra decided to strike up a conversation, in the hopes that it would distract him. 

"I think we've driven around the city a couple of times, is there a specific place you want me to take you?" 

"Keep driving." 

I was just wondering because-" 

"Shut up!", Jackefsky yelled pushing her head with the gun. 

"Alright, alright. Sorry", she made a left turn past her apartment building, "I was just trying to make conversation." 

"I know what you were trying to do, I know how you women are", Jackefsky sneered rubbing his forehead, "Only good for one thing. Turn there." 

"It's getting dark, don't you want me to take you to the train station or the bus depot?", Alexandra asked turning into the suburban area. 

"No. Turn there." 

Alexandra turned onto the street until she saw a large building come into view. 

"No", she said stopping the car to a screeching halt, "Not the high school." 

Jackefsky put the gun to the corner of her eye. 

"Drive slowly." 

"Listen, you have me, you have my car, what more do you want?" 

"Drive!" 

Alexandra started the car and drove past the school slowly. As she drove, Jackefsky stared intently outside the window at a group of kids getting out of their cars. Alexandra was so filled with disgust that she pressed her foot hard against the gas pedal and the car sped up. 

"Sorry my foot slipped", she said seething with anger. 

"No it didn't! You're lying! Don't lie to me, don't ever lie to me!", Jackefsky said hitting himself over the head, 

"I'm getting a headache, you don't want me to get a headache." 

"Why what happens when you get a headache?"   
  


"He hears voices telling him to attack", Batman told Alfred over the video link screen, "His usually victims are young brunette woman between the ages of ten to twenty-five. I'm going to check out places he has attacked victims. Playgrounds, clubs, neighborhoods." 

"Right sir", Alfred said, "And I'll prepare your usual breakfast of coffee, toast, bandages and -." 

"Aspirin", Alexandra said, "For your headache. I could stop at the drugstore, I'll be in and out in two-" 

"I don't think so." 

"Why not? I'm not going to try to get away, you can come in with me." 

Jackefsky was silent. 

"Aren't you hungry?"   
  


"No." 

"Are you sure, I could get a candy bar." 

"Just get the aspirin and let's go", Jackefsky whispered pushing the barrel of the gun into her ribs. 

"Alright.", she grabbed the aspirin, "You'll need water too." 

As she turned around to get the water, she secretly slipped a small bottle from the shelf into her coat pocket. She took a bottle of water and they headed for the counter. After she paid for the purchases, Jackefsky ushered her towards the door. As they passed through the security detectors, two loud beeps sounded and the store clerk was at their side in a moment. As the clerk reached for the bag Alexandra was holding, Jackefsky pulled out his gun. 

"Back away kid", Jackefsky said pointing the gun at the clerk. 

The boy backed away holding his hands up and as more people came forward to see what was happening, their gasps rippled through the store. 

"Everybody get on the floor or else, it's her brains all over the tile", Jackefsky yelled putting the gun to   
Alexandra's head. 

"Trust me, he just escaped from an asylum, you better do what he says", Alexandra added. 

The few customers in the drugstore dropped to the floor, putting their heads down as Jackefsky took Alexandra and hurried out of the store into the car. 

As Alexandra sped away in her car, he snatched the bag away from her and furiously opened the bottle , poured some pills into his hand, throwing the bottle into the front seat and swallowed it with the water. Alexandra spied the bottle lying on the seat next to hers. 

"So what were you before you went..you know", Alexandra asked as she pushed the bottle under the car seat, 

"Carpenter? Guidance counselor? Gynecologist?" 

"Turn." 

"Right." 

When they were one turn away from the high school, the car began to sputter and slow down. 

"What's going on?", Jackefsky asked. 

"I'm out of gas", Alexandra said as the car stopped. 

"Shit! Get out", Jackefsky said opening the door. 

Alexandra hesitated until Jackefsky got out and opened her door. As she was getting out, she felt a sharp pain to   
the back of her head and blacked out. 

"This is where you get off", Jackefsky said dragging her out of the driver's seat.   
  


"All units. Robbery at 15 Ashbury Lane. Turner's Drugstore. Robber was armed and had a hostage, who said   
was an escapee from Arkham Asylum.. Last seen driving away in a red Porsche" 

The Batmobile squealed to a stop and turned around in the other direction towards Ashbury Lane. 

"I'm dead tired. I mean could play practice have been any longer?", the young girl said as her friend started her car, "Call me when you get home." 

After she watched the car speed out of the parking lot, she headed for her own. As she was about to open her car door, she saw someone's reflection behind her and jumped from shock. She turned around and screamed.   
  


Alexandra blinked a few times before she remembered what had happened. She was in the back seat of her car and Jackefsky was gone. She rolled over off the seat, now she had a headache. As she was getting up, she heard a scream coming from the back parking lot of the high school.   
  


Jackefsky clamped his hand over the young brunette's mouth. 

"Not a word, okay", he whispered huskily into her ear, "Okay?" 

The girl nodded frightened. Jackefsky smiled and threw her unto the ground. 

"Please, don't hurt me", the girl begged through her sobs. 

"It won't hurt if you don't struggle", Jackefsky said sinisterly. 

Then his eyes rolled to the back of his head and he collapsed on the ground. The girl screamed not sure of what was going on. Then Alexandra came running up to the two of them lying in the parking lot of the high school. 

"Are you okay?", Alexandra asked helping the girl to her feet. 

"I think so", the girl said obviously shaken, "What just happened?" 

"He passed out", Alexandra said walking over to Jackefsky's body, "Too many sleeping pills I guess." 

Alexandra reached for the gun but a hand grabbed hers. 

"But not enough", Jackefsky said getting to his feet with the gun to Alexandra's head. 

"I'm getting really familiar with this situation", Alexandra said to the girl. 

"You", Jackefsky said grabbing her by the chin, "I've had enough of." 

"Trust me", Alexandra said elbowing him in the stomach, "The feelings mutual." 

As Jackefsky doubled back, Alexandra kicked him in the face and tried to take the gun from him. Jackefsky grabbed her by the hair and threw her against the wall of the building, Alexandra hit her head and slumped down onto the ground. Between the searing pain in her head and her blurry vision, Alexandra could make out Jackefsky going towards the young girl. She tried to get up but her head felt as though someone had taken a jackhammer to it. All of a sudden a black figure swooped down on Jackefsky and the girl. Before Jackefsky could even turn around the figure, the black mass threw him across the parking lot a few feet away from Alexandra, leaving his gun behind. The girl screamed again and Alexandra tried to get up again so she could get closer to the action to see if the figure that had just arrived was who she thought it was. The black figure leaned into Jackefsky and said something Alexandra couldn't make out, he then (Alexandra had figured it was a man) lifted Jackefsky off the ground. Alexandra could see the terror in Jackefsky's eyes and as she turned her head she saw another figure on top of the building hurdling down towards the two men. 

"Batman look out!", Alexandra said weakly not sure he heard her. 

He turned to her but it was too late, the figure kicked Batman across the parking lot and Jackefsky dropped to the   
ground. This figure was more sleeker than the Batman, dressed in all black with a mask on and an emblem on the chest that Alexandra couldn't make out. 

What the hell is going on here?, Alexandra asked herself bewildered. 

She turned to see where the Batman was, not noticing that the young girl had disappeared, but couldn't find him in the darkness. The other figure, which also looked like a man, went over to Jackefsky, said something to him and then broke his neck quite easily. The Batman coming out of nowhere, grabbed the man and punched him so hard flipped over unto the pavement. The man quickly regained himself and got up kicking Batman in the stomach. 

"Batman, I presume", the man said. 

"And you are?", the Batman asked pushing back his cape. 

"Done", the man said pulling out little spherical objects. He threw them on the ground, releasing a thick smoke that quickly filled the parking lot. 

Alexandra couldn't see but could finally get up. Before she could stand steadily, she could feel someone grab her and she was being lifted into the air. When she could see, she found herself on the roof, with Batman. 

"Are you alright?", he asked, the police sirens blaring through the barren streets. 

"Yeah", Alexandra said trying to shake the dizziness out of her, "Um, my head." 

He took her hand away and inspected her head gingerly. 

"I think I might have a concussion, because I'm about to pass out", Alexandra said somnolently and then fell into his arms.   
  


"Can't you do this another time, detective?", Jasmine Fox asked, "She's been through a very traumatic experience and she's still in the hospital." 

"I'm sure there's no rest for this law enforcement officer, Jasmine", Alexandra said straightening up in her hospital bed, "Especially when trying to save face in such an embarrassing situation as letting a serial rapist escape from right under his nose." 

"I'll make this quick", Detective Bullock gritted through his teeth motioning for the nurse to leave them alone. 

"Well I can tell you everything that happened up until the point when we got to the school, it gets kind of fuzzy after that" Alexandra said., "That would be when Jackefsky hit me over the head, the first time. I remember hearing police sirens-," she turned to Bullock, "Who called the police?" 

"The young woman that was attacked, Angela Jensen." 

"Oh." 

"Miss Jensen also claimed to have seen the Batman, she said he was the one who saved her from Jack the Ripper.." 

"Batman?!" Alexandra said angrily, "Where was I when all this happened, huh? I was the one who switched the aspirin with the sleeping pills so Jackefsky would pass out. I was one the one who stopped him from raping her!" 

"So the Batman wasn't there?" 

"Well, I guess I vaguely remember him making an appearance at some point in time" she said uncomfortably, trying to avoid eye contact with her friend. 

"Did Batman kill the Ripper?", Bullock asked seriously. 

"No!", Alexandra blurted out, "I mean, I don't remember much of what happened, but I know he didn't." 

"If he didn't, who did?", Bullock asked suspiciously, "Necks don't just break by themselves." 

"Yes I know, but thank you for reminding me", Alexandra said sarcastically, "There was someone else there." 

"Someone else?" Bullock asked surprised, "Who?" 

"I don't know, I vaguely remember, but I know someone else besides the Batman got to Jackefsky." 

"Are you sure?" 

"Positive", Alexandra said firmly, "Listen, I'm really tired and the events of last night are still really-" 

"Yeah I know", Bullock interrupted, "Vague. As soon as you're released you'll have to come down to the station and make a formal report." 

"Of course", she said as the detective left the room, "Alright. Good-bye. Have a good one. Drive safely", as   
soon as Bullock was out of earshot, "Close the door." 

As soon as Jasmine closed the room door, a big smile spread across her face. 

"So, saved by the Batman" Jasmine smugly said walking over to her, "How ironic that the same day you gave your little tirade on the nonexistence of the Batman that this should happen." 

"Yes, I guess being held hostage by a sociopathic rapist was Fate's little way of telling me that yes Virginia, there is a Batman." 

"Told you so" Jasmine said self-satisfied. 

"Are you done?" Alexandra asked drolly staring at the window. 

"So not only do you now believe in Batman but you have just exonerated him from a crime" Jasmine went on. 

Jasmine looked strangely at Alexandra. 

"What's wrong?" Jasmine asked. 

"Nothing, I was just thinking" she said turning away from the window, "How do you think Jackefsky escaped?" 

"I don't know" Jasmine shrugged, "The same way everyone else escapes from Arkham." 

"Ha, ha." 

"Why how do you think he got out?"   
  
  


...Did you like it? I did, but then again, I wrote it. Yeah, so next story is TWENTY QUESTIONS. It's basically for anyone who didn't understand this story. 


End file.
